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Top 10 Things Inside The Derek Jeter Gift Basket
The NY Times and the rest of the world reported the following regarding the greatest pimp in sports history:
Derek has girls stay with him at his apartment in New York, and then he gets them a car to take them home the next day. Waiting in his car is a gift basket containing signed Jeter memorabilia, usually a signed baseball,” the friend dished.
“This summer, he ended up hooking up with a girl who he had hooked up with once before, but Jeter seemed to have forgotten about the first time and gave her the same identical parting gift, a gift basket with a signed Derek Jeter baseball,” the pal said. He basically gave her the same gift twice because he’d forgotten hooking up with her the first time!”
So if your girlfriend or wife has a signed Derek Jeter baseball, you know whats the deal. So with that being said, here are the top 10 things inside the Derek Jeter gift basket.
10. Autographed Baseball
Ball is signed by the entire 2008 Trenton Thunder baseball team and not Derek Jeter himself.
9. Tickets For 4 To Go See Twilight
Special instructions on these tickets clearly state: Do not invite Mr. Jeter.
8. Thank You Card
This card is not hand written. It has a photocopied message that says: Thanks for a great time last night (fill in name here). Signed Derek Motha Fuckin Jeter.
7. Gatorade
The blue flavor.
6. Memory Erasing Pills
Special instructions come with these pills as well. The clearly state: Take these pill as soon as the driver takes you to your final destination.
5. A DVD Copy of The Other Guys
He played a homeless person who gets killed by Marky Mark.
4. A Plaque
The plaque is engraved: I Had Sex With Derek Jeter.
3. Ham and Cheese Sandwich
A girl has to eat.
2. A Pen and Paper
This is so the girl can jot down the names and phone numbers of all of her female friends so they too can enjoy a night with Derek Jeter.
1. Morning After Pills
These pills are taken just as Mr. Jeter leaves the girl at the car so he can witness that they take these pills and he also checks under the girls tounge to make sure she doesnt try to sneak a kid out of her vagina 9 months later.
Michael Jordan G.O.A.T
Every generation has it’s heroes, and who can forget their dad telling them about the “greatest” athlete of their eras? Dick Butkus was the greatest linebacker to ever suit up, running through walls and bench pressing Toyotas. Babe Ruth was incomparable, belting homers while eating hot dogs and battling fascism. Jesse Owens was so fast that when he raced he often traveled through time…
There is always something.
Luckily, we are blessed to live in the YouTube era, where I can quickly prove to my 3 year old son why Michael Jeffrey Jordan is far and away the greatest to ever play the game. Check out this video on Mike’s 10 Best Dunks and remind yourself what being “great” is all about.
L.A. Dodger James Loney Crashes Car And Spits On Cops
We have learned that James Loney, the 1st baseman for the L.A. Dodgers, allegedly crashed his Maserati into three cars including a Toyota, Mercedes, and Mini. He then became aggressive with cops when they attempted to give him a breathalyzer test at a nearby hospital.
Flexible Tablet Coming Soon?
Technology, like time, waits for no one. Today, the tablet computer industry is arguably the hottest thing going in tech. The iPad, brainchild of the late Steve Jobs, has changed the way consumers look at tablets and led to a sales smash that still is moving in record numbers while nearing its third iteration. Indeed, its introduction has ushered in an era where, it seems, a new tablet launches every month. No tablet yet, though, can touch the iPad.
Samsung, itself a competitor of Apple in everything from tablets to smartphones, may soon launch the next “game changer” in tablet computing, introducing “a conceptual tablet with a flexible AMOLED screen, then the tablets of the future will make the current ones look ancient in comparison.
In the video, a see-through device made entirely of a flexible, AMOLED touch screen is used to take photos, watch videos, read news, play 3D games and translate speech from one language to another – and it all looks amazing.” [via Mashable]
This thing looks amazing, and the possibilities are countless! Super thin smartphones, televisions, and computers could all benefit this technology. Consider all the possibilities in the private sectors as well, with hospitals, airlines, and the auto industry all be ing able to do more with less.
Check out this video on the future of Flexible Amoled Tablets
Albert Pujols Is An… Angel?
Albert Pujols has officially signed with the So Im sitting here wondering why did Albert Pujols leave the team and mid-west city that nurtured him for Anahiem? I think I know the one and only reason:
Pujols is really 43-years old and the move to the American League where he can become a DH in two seasons makes complete sense.
Oh, and $250-million doesnt hurt either.
2012 Ice Girls Bikini Shoot
Heres an extended behind-the-scenes look at the making of the 2012 LA Kings Ice Girls bikini calendar. Kings Vision was on hand for the 11-12 Ice Crew calendar and studio photo shoots! Check out this profile featuring one of the sisters of November, Taylor!
Video is below.
Get Shorty – Rick’s Cabaret Girl Elise
Special thanks to our friends over at Rick’s Cabaret New York for the latest Get Shorty model, Elise. 5’10″, 21 years old, and crazy about the Yankees (you hear that, Turd?), Elise is one fun girl and a featured performer at the club. And now, she joins the ranks of “Get Shorty” greats…enjoy!
[pics courtesy of Rick's Cabaret New York]
